You must read (yes, really read)

Six months to the day after I got my Aqua Zumba qualification, the training manual finally arrived. Apart from time, it took quite a number of emails to Zumba’s home office. Apparently, this was the third attempt to send it to me by FedEx (third time’s a charm). I don’t know what exactly was the problem, all the other materials reach me in time by ordinary mail.

In other matters the home office acts much quicker (doesn’t mean better). Last week I discovered that I cannot log in to my Zumba account without going through this:

YOU MUST READ (YES, REALLY READ) AND AGREE TO THE TERMS OF THIS ZIN MEMBERSHIP & LICENSE AGREEMENT TO CONTINUE.

Oh dear. Irritating as it is, “agreeing” means simply clicking on a button “I agree”, but I took my time to read through. I wonder how many people cared to do that. Some points in this agreement peeved me more than others; the most annoying thing, however, is the generally patronising attitude of Zumba Fitness, LLC (“Zumba”). I have to admit that I got rather angry at first. Then I reached the section 15 (of 23). Why didn’t they move it to the beginning?

15. Relationship of Parties. The legal relationship between Zumba and Instructor shall be that of licensor and licensee. Nothing in this Agreement shall be construed as creating any partnership, joint venture, agency, franchise, sales representative or employment relationship between the parties, nor shall Zumba be deemed to be acting in a fiduciary capacity with respect to Instructor.

So that’s it then. Calm down, naïve Zumba instructor: “Zumba” is not your partner or employer. Nor is it your friend. It does not trust you, so I don’t see why you should trust it either. You should not feel any loyalty towards Zumba Fitness, LLC any more than towards, say, Microsoft when clicking on “I agree” button during software installation.

Ah, Zumba, Zumba, what a great idea, what a shame about all this corporate nonsense.